When we assault self-esteem it either fights back or shrinks away. When it fights back much energy is wasted cleaning up the relationship damage. When it shrinks away it is either lost or its return is so elusive much energy is spent recapturing it.  Either way, an assault on self-esteem is guaranteed to eat up energy...just to get back to the way things were before the assault. Gives us a couple of choices...Choosing not to assault self-esteem and conserving our energy for other actions...Choosing to assault self-esteem and destine ourselves to wasting energy.

The better choice seems clear enough.