To a large degree we are defined by our prevailing moods.  They illustrate our personality. They signal our character.  And deeper down, our prevailing moods set boundaries around our states of mind and to a large degree govern our thoughts and actions. 

Our prevailing moods are illustrations of our predominant emotions. They are also illustrations of our abilities to self-monitor and self-regulate. They illustrate our emotional intelligence. 

It seems there is a very curious linkage between our prevailing moods and our ability to perform. While psychological studies may or may not confirm it, observations suggest that the extremes of prevailing moods can generate the highest levels of performance. For example, many deeply depressed people excel in their chosen fields of endeavour (Churchill and Van Gogh come to mind).  And we all know people with pleasing personalities who achieve upper-level success in their chosen lines of work [Gandhi & JFK come to mind].

On the other hand, often, we are fooled by apparently-positive personalities.  For example, Robin Williams regularly presented himself as a zany, happy person. Yet, his real personality must have been quite different from the character/persona he presented in many of his highly-successful entertainment roles. 

So, we can be fooled by external performances. Theatre entertainers, movie entertainers, and TV entertainers fool us all the time – that’s their job. Perhaps, many of our day-to-day associates do the same thing to us? Perhaps, it is wrong to think we can accurately judge personality and character by external appearances.  We know it is better to watch what they do than listen to what they say. [That old-admonition/wisdom has been credited to John Locke, Andrew Carnegie, and others...I expect it dates back much further than these fellows.] 

But, clearly, on its own watching what they do isn't a sufficient strategy. 

Regardless, even if watching what they do is not a completely reliable way of gauging personality and character, we must still do it. While we observe them we must maintain a level of trust in other people...giving them the benefit of the doubt...not all of the time, but at least most of the time.  With a trusting mindset, we must observe them – to confirm we have gauged them accurately. And, we must do more than just watch what they do. We must read 'between the lines' of what they do. And we must ask them the right questions, so we understand why they are doing what they're doing. This combination of approaches will allow us to get a far better handle on other people’s personalities and character. 

Managing Customers’ Expectations...let's revisit that.

First, I favour the use of the word “client” over the work “customer”. As some sales gurus teach – customers are people who buy things from you while clients are people who pay professional people for service. [I want to serve clients.]

Second, early in my career I was taught the concept known as managing clients’ expectations. Now, I don’t think that is what we should be trying to do. The managing that needs to be done is self-management, not-client management.

Whether we agree on that second point or not, we agree we do not want to surprise our clients when we know the surprises will be negative from the clients’ perspectives [bad news, problems].  So, most of us believe it is a good to be proactive, to anticipate potential problems, and to put strategies and actions into place to minimize the likelihood of troubling our clients with negative surprises. 

Regardless of our best efforts we know, sooner or later, problems will arise and some of those problems will have a negative impact on our clients.  So, not wanting to surprise our clients, we want to know how to handle those situations and remove or reduce the negative impact on our clients. 

Six thoughts immediately come to mind: remedial action [damage control], disclosure, preconditioning, what I call “over-communication”, lessons learned, and preventative maintenance.

• remedial action [damage control] – Many people work at minimizing the damage they could experience; fewer people work at minimizing their clients could experience. , 
• disclosure – Disclosure of problems and potential damage could expose people to risk; failure to disclose could expand the risks faced by clients., 
• preconditioning – We could work to spin stories that protect us; we could work to help clients prepare for the possibility of damages., 
• over-communication – Some people become annoyed when we repeat ourselves; some people appreciate reminders., 
• lessons learned – Some people fail to learn from their problem-experiences; some people teach others the lessons they have learned through hard knocks., 
• preventative maintenance – We can work to remove our problems before they arrive; we can work to remove clients’ problems before they arrive.

Also - two personal Values immediately come to mind: Courage & Confidence.

To maximize the positive use of stress energy:

• believe you can succeed, 
• truly understand your personal talents and strengths, 
• anticipate situations and prepare [in advance] your reaction to them, 
• gather the tools and people support you need prior to the arrival of the situation/event, and 
• practice self-talk/autosuggestion/affirmations designed to bolster your self-confidence and courage.