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Name of author Rick Baker, P.Eng.

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Do you want to be on time?

by Rick Baker
On May 2, 2017

On Timeliness...

Do you know anyone who has achieved success in life without having the habit of meeting time commitments?

As I write this I'm thinking of petulant actors/actresses exerting their will on frazzled directors...that behind-the-scenes movie cliché, where one person disrupts everyone else's plans and schedules.  On top of that, I'm thinking of the 1992 comedy movie 'Noises Off', which combined this behind-the-scenes movie cliché with a plot that is all about humorous consequences that could happen when people fail to meet time cues in live theatre. 

While we can laugh about people messing up timing in movies, we seldom laugh about it in real life. 

There are many sayings that capture our consensus view/wisdom around time and timing, as examples - 

  • Time waits for no man.
  • Time is of the essence.
  • Timing is everything.

Yet, almost all of us mess up timing, at least once in a while. We forget appointments. We arrive late for meetings. We fail to meet project deadlines.

Some people are habitually late. [Most families have at least one of these types...always late while the meal is overcooking or the cake & ice cream is on hold...waiting.] 

Some people are intentionally late. [They act like 'The Royals'...or like they are, by far, the most-important person at the meeting.]

Some people completely lack any talent for timeliness. [Like they have stormy clouds of confusion around their watches and calendars.]

***

It seems to me timeliness holds lower priority now than it did a few decades ago. 

Do you agree?

How do you feel about timeliness - 

  • Do you want others to be on time?
  • Do you want to be on time?

What mental-attitude flavour do you choose: Positivity, Negativity, or Indifference?

by Rick Baker
On May 1, 2017

The Thinking Behind The Tweet

The cornerstone of our personality, our mental attitude, shows up as the general flavour of our thoughts...as illustrated in our actions/behaviour.

People. Icebergs.

by Rick Baker
On Apr 18, 2017

When we observe people, we observe the equivalent of the tip of the iceberg.

We observe people's Actions. We observe their vocal actions, their body language, and the wide variety of their other physical actions. Yes, to various degrees we have hunches - intuitions - which allow us to sense things beyond their actions. Regardless, for the most part, our perceptions of people are based on our observations of their Actions.

And, that's like looking at the tip of an iceberg.

Here's how I see it...

We observe a person's Actions. The person's Actions create in our minds perceptions of the person's Energy, Thoughts, Talents, Self-Control, Intelligence, and Emotions. And, those are the most important things people possess beyond the Actions we observe. These 7 things - Actions, Energy, Thoughts, Talents, Self-Control, Intelligence, and Emotions - are the essence of human beings. One of the facets that make up the essence - Action - is visible to other people. The other 6 facets are hidden from others and it is often difficult to understand their nature in self let alone in others.

Energy is perhaps closest to the surface. Certainly, Energy is closely tied to Actions. When we see an energetic person it registers. Sometimes, high-energy Action impresses us immensely and moves us deeply. As examples, we are impressed by energetic athletic performances and moved deeply by energetic musical performances. Sometimes, the energy is much more subtle yet of equally powerful impact. For example, we can be moved deeply by poetry. Perhaps - or, should I say likely - our perceptions of another person's energy are more reliable than our perceptions of the 6 underlying facets. In most situations, when we see little evidence of energy in others we conclude they are resting, or they are lazy, or they are ill. In certain situations, we interpret other people's lack of energy as a signal they are thinking or meditating. But, often a lack of evidence of energy is interpreted to be a negative signal. Evidence of action, particularly energetic action, can be interpreted in many ways...ranging from very bad to very good...depending on our values and our other judgement factors and how the other person's actions align with our values and judgements.

Thoughts come in many forms. Desires are thoughts, as are goals and ambitions. Feelings are thoughts tied to Emotions and desires. When feelings last for extended periods, say a day or so, they become moods. When we lose the ability to control our feelings and other thoughts within 'reasonable/normal' boundaries moods transform into mental states such as clinical depression, mania, dementia, paranoia, etc. Some thoughts are good, some are bad. The easiest way to draw the line between good and bad is to ask the question, "Does this thought help me achieve my long-term goals?" If the answer is "Yes" then the thought is a good thought. If the answer is "Maybe" or "No" then the thought is a bad thought. Habits straddle Thoughts and Actions. Habits are Thoughts [including feelings] and Actions that are repeated. And good habits are repeated thoughts or actions that take us towards our long-term goals while bad habits do not. There is a strong link between the Thoughts and Actions that form a person's good habits. Good-habit Actions are the result of repeated cerebral cortex activity...repeated so frequently they become resistant to Emotions. Habits are closely tied to Self-Control.

Talents are innate. Some [if not most & perhaps even all] are genetic in origin, gifts from our parents and their ancestors. Talents respond well to strong, supportive early-childhood influences. For example, innate musical Talents can blossom into gifted Action at a very early age when supported by masterful coaching. Gretzky and Mozart come to mind. Yet Talents can also be suppressed and buried at an early age, never to be discovered. Processes exist to help us discover our Talents. Some are simple. For example, there is a close linkage between our feelings and our Talents. When we are feeling good and are enthusiastic while performing Actions, that's a signal that Talents could be at work. Conversely, when we have negative feelings while doing tasks and processes that could be a signal the Action is outside our Talent zone. Talents do not show up as Action unless they have the opportunity to do so. Talents do not show up as strengths [task and process mastery] unless they are combined with specialized knowledge and practised skills. The amount of practice is large. That requires commitment and persistence, so Self-Control is essential to strength - mastery of Action. When we observe other people illustrating mastery of Action, we can assume they have talent, knowledge, and skill in that area. We can assume the Action mastery required Thought and Self-Control.

Self-Control is a magnificent facet. It is reasonable to assume it has some genetic roots. However, clearly, it can be influenced by environmental factors. Social psychologists have proven situations and 'role models' play a huge role in human behaviour. Philosophers and psychologists have argued both for and against power of will. Psychologists have added texture to Self-Control, differentiating between short-term 'self-control' and long-term 'grit'. Regardless, for this introductory discussion, the ability to exercise will power is the same as the ability to exercise Self-Control and if these things cannot be exercised over the long term then their value is limited. Self-Control is the ingredient that allows the other 5 hidden facets and the resulting Actions to generate success. Self-Control consumes energy as bad habits are replaced with new things and good habits. Self-Control conserves energy when good habits are firmly in place. Self-Control enables Intelligence to gain ground, slowly over time and with repetition of focused Thought, over Emotions and unfocused Thought. Self-Control funnels energy to Talents so they have the opportunity to be exposed for long periods to the practice required to master the skills of Action. 

Intelligence is the quality and amount of information we have stored in and can retrieve from our brains...as measured by others' perceptions of our Actions. Intelligence has both IQ and EQ components. When we have information in our minds and cannot retrieve it and convert it into Action that information is knowledge, not Intelligence. Human Intelligence only exists when it is perceived by other people. And, it can only be perceived when it manifests itself into physical form - and that means Action. Unfortunately, people's perceptions are influenced by a range of biases...literally, hundreds of biases. With that understood, there is little chance for one's Intelligence to be accurately understood or measured by other people. People observe our Actions. Their observations and perceptions of our Actions determine their opinion of our Intelligence. Yes - IQ tests are directionally correct within the limitations of a biased, narrow, and restrictive range. The same holds true for EQ tests. In the real world, people observe our Actions- they observe what we say and what we do - and they draw conclusions around our Intelligence [which they being biased, typically, underestimate].

Emotions are vestiges of pre-history. They are automatic chemical/electrical/physiological responses, largely outside of consciousness. They

occur quickly and are of short duration. In modern days of business, where fight or flight are generally not appropriate responses, they do us little good. Yet, Emotions live on and are deeply rooted in our subconscious minds. They are deep-rooted in the mind of the person doing the Action. And, they can influence Action. At the same time, Emotions are also deep-rooted in the mind of the person who observes the Action. So, they can also influence the perception of the observer. Emotions, somehow, support the formation and maintenance of bad habits...Emotions work against positive change. There is evidence confirming Intelligence and Self-Control can focus Energy and Thoughts to offset the awesome natural power of Emotions. This works best when Talents are in play. 

Summing up...

When we observe other people's Actions we need to remember we are observing the tip of an iceberg. And, we need to remember our perceptions are skewed by numerous biases. We need to take time to make judgements of other people's motives and abilities. We need to communicate more clearly and work to understand other people. We need to ask good questions and listen well to the answers. We need to extend more trust. We need to invest in building stronger relationships.

 

 First posted December 12, 2013

When you annoy people you don't make money...[unless you happen to be a sitcom actor or a Don Rickles clone]

by Rick Baker
On Apr 13, 2017

The Thinking Behind The Tweet

You can choose to adjust your personality so it is more pleasing and less annoying.

Sometimes, the choice involves biting your tongue.

All the time, it involves thinking.

Even those not blessed with natural, pleasing personalities can think and bite their tongues.

Tags:

Communication: Improving Communication | Personalities @ Work | Thought Tweets

getting at the Maybe rut

by Rick Baker
On Apr 6, 2017

Somewhere between the Pessimists and the Optimists there is a group of people who live lives of Maybe.  

Procrastinators are in this group...sooner or later they may get around to starting, doing and finishing stuff. Procrastinators live lives of Maybe - maybe that bad thing will happen if I do this? Maybe it won't? Not sure. Uncertainty. If you are a salesperson you will agree many prospective clients fall into this group. They would rather say "call me back" than "no". 

Sometimes, Maybe-people believe it is better to say Maybe than No because No tends to hurt others' feelings. 

And, of course, there are those who simply have the habit of being indecisive: they make up the majority of this Maybe group of people.

It seems to me, the major cause of indecision is lack of self-confidence. There are other causes for indecision, as examples - distraction, lack of interest and lack of consideration for other people's interests. However, if we spent enough time digging we would likely find a lack of self-confidence close to the roots of all these other causes.

The Effects of Maybe:

  • Maybe eats up time. When their time gets eaten up, Maybe-people think they don't have enough time. Of course that's wrong-thinking. Regardless, of course, it sours the ability of Maybe-people to accomplish constructive things. I call this, getting in the Maybe rut
  • Maybe generates anxiety and stress. These things permeate Maybe-minds and eat up space for logical thinking. This is another debilitating aspect of the Maybe rut. 
  • Maybe-people are allergic to peace of mind. It's like Maybe coats their minds in Teflon...when peace of mind tries to visit it is deflected and doomed to never become comfortable enough to establish roots. 

Tags:

Optimism & Pessimism | Personalities @ Work

Biting your tongue just before it expresses something incorrect or stupid or otherwise wrong – that’s a good thing

by Rick Baker
On Mar 23, 2017

The Thinking Behind The Tweet

You can choose to adjust your personality so it is more pleasing and less annoying. Sometimes, the choice involves biting your tongue.

Tags:

Communication: Improving Communication | Personalities @ Work | Thought Tweets

Copyright © 2012. W.F.C (Rick) Baker. All Rights Reserved.