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Name of author Rick Baker, P.Eng.

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Change your thinking about Integrity & Improve your ability to Influence others

by Rick Baker
On Sep 10, 2013

If you embrace a better definition of Integrity, you will improve your ability to Influence people.

Due to the amazing nuances of our English language you have choices about Integrity. You can choose Integrity to contain moral judgment; you can choose Integrity to mean unimpaired and sound; you can choose Integrity to mean complete. And, you can choose Integrity to mean combinations of these concepts.

Critical here is: you do not have to lace Integrity with moral judgment.

And, if you choose to remove moral judgment from your Integrity-thinking you open your mind and you simplify your thinking. You open your mind by making Integrity an external thing…not about you…about other things. Not about right and wrong. You simplify your thinking by linking Integrity with non-judgmental concepts – ‘unimpaired’ and ‘complete’…the pieces fit together…the pieces tie together…the pieces withstand scrutiny…the pieces withstand the test of time…the pieces are simple and when combined, the pieces make sense.  

When compared to moral judgment, the concepts ‘unimpaired’ and ‘complete’ are easier to measure. When compared to moral judgment, the concepts ‘unimpaired’ and ‘complete’ are easier to communicate with other people. When compared to moral judgment, the concepts ‘unimpaired’ and ‘complete’ are easier to embrace with other people.

The concepts ‘unimpaired’ and ‘complete’ open the door to common ground.

Common ground is the framework for Influence.

You can choose to define Integrity as:

  1. When you know your Personal Values and
  2. When you can express your Personal Values in writing [showing how you think the think] and
  3. When you can talk with others about your Personal Values [talk the talk] and
  4. When your actions are consistent with your Personal Values [walk the walk] and
  5. When you acknowledge your think-talk-walk errors and strive to not repeat them

          …then you have Integrity.

You can let people know this definition does not contain biases in moral judgment zones.  It’s just about whether or not things are ‘unimpaired’ and ‘complete’.

Then you will, naturally, seek first to understand.

Then you will, naturally, keep your biases in check.

Then you will, naturally, expand your Influence.

 

PS: Very few other people have interest in your or anyone else's moral judgments...they have enough of their own...and constructive criticism is an oxymoron.

Tags:

Communication: Improving Communication | Criticism: Constructive Criticism is an Oxymoron | Definitions - Spirited Words Defined | Influencing | Leaders' Thoughts | Values: Personal Values

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Did our ancestors have thicker skin?

by Rick Baker
On Aug 1, 2013

Our skin is about a millimetre thick.

That's thick enough to protect our soft and vulnerable internal things from most damage.

Yet, far too often, it is not thick enough to protect our soft and vulnerable egos. Somehow, the opinions of others can pierce our thin skin, offend our egos, and distract, dampen, and damage our spirits.

Why does this happen?

How does this happen?

Has this always been the case?

Or -

Did our ancestors have thicker skin?

Did our ancestors view criticism as a noble form of communication? Was there a time when many people, perhaps even whole tribes or communities, had skin that thick?

If so, what happened?

How did people's skin become thinner?

Is it the larger the community the thinner the skin?

Is it the more-advanced the civilization the thinner the skin?

Is it the more the possessions the less the skin?

The more the stuff the less the skin?

And -

Why don't more people take the time to do some self-analysis, obtain some help, and thicken up their skin?

Do people see thin skin as an inevitable part of their destiny...pre-determined, evolution-engineered?

Do they blame their parents, their grandparents, their great-grandparents and so on?

Or - 

Do they wonder - Did our ancestors have thicker skin?

Tags:

Beyond Business | Criticism: Constructive Criticism is an Oxymoron | Family Business and CFFB | Questions?: The Art of Asking Good Questions | Thick Skin & Thin Skull

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Thought Tweet #781

by Rick Baker
On Jul 15, 2013

Thought Tweet #781 People eat sour fruit sparingly. Yet they complain about it much.

  

 

The Thinking Behind The Tweet

Sometimes sour fruit is the best thing to consume. The British found that out several centuries ago and the practice of eating limes was encouraged by Scottish Dr. James Lind. He helped the British Navy understand limes and lime juice prevented sailors from the pain and suffering of scurvy. This fact was known prior to the arrival of Dr. Lind. And, the benefit of limes was well understood when he documented proof. Yet, the practice of eating limes to prevent scurvy was not adopted by the British Navy until some time later.

The first sailors who ate limes were ridiculed. By fellow sailors and pirates alike.

To this day the legacy of ridicule lives on in the form of a derogatory/racist ancestor of the word lime.

To this day, people resist when others try to force them to eat sour fruit.

So, take care when you try to unload sour fruit on your people.

Care taken while introducing sour fruit is inversely proportional to the amount of complaining that introduction generates. The greater the care, the lesser the complaints.

Tags:

Beyond Business | Criticism: Constructive Criticism is an Oxymoron | Humour | Thought Tweets

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Thought Tweet #756

by Rick Baker
On Jun 10, 2013

Thought Tweet #756 Give yourself injections of that oxymoron, Constructive Criticism

 

The Thinking Behind The Tweet

Create a Do It Yourself hormesis-program, aimed at thickening your skin and building your tolerance for other people's shortcomings. 

CAUTION: If you are like most people then your initial tolerance for criticism will be unbelievably low...so start with very low doses of self-criticism. And, build the doses up slowly over time...until you are able to face your screaming vein-bulging face in the mirror. 

 

And

Remember

Do Unto Yourself Before You Do Unto Others

Tags:

Criticism: Constructive Criticism is an Oxymoron | Humour | Thick Skin & Thin Skull | Thought Tweets

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People are social creatures...with interesting approaches to making decisions

by Rick Baker
On Jun 4, 2013

Dealing with Other People: Making Business Decisions

People are social creatures:

  • we live with one another, 
  • we live near one another in community, and 
  • we 'work with' one another. 

The actions we take at work affect and influence one another. The thoughts we share about work affect one another.

People approach work with differing attitude. Some of us are more serious about work than others. Put another way, for some people work plays an important role in their lives while for others it does not.

Work-life involves a continuous string of dealings with other people.

Boiling it down...we can choose to view other people:

  • as very distinct and different (every Man is a stand-alone island),
  • as very similar to us,
  • as 'things' that can help us achieve our goals, and
  • as individuals who are doing their best to deal with their challenges and to achieve their goals. 

We may view certain people one or more of these ways while viewing other people in entirely different ways.

In business, we must 'work with people' to achieve what we hope are common work-goals. When we work with people, Decisions can be made 3 ways: Command-Consultative-Consensus. [I favour a 10-3-1 approach.] Command decisions are made by one person, the person with authority. Consultative decisions are made by the person with authority after gathering ideas from others (without being obligated to use any or all of those ideas). Consensus decisions are 'democratic' decisions made by groups of people, who commit to follow the group decision after it is made.

Overlapping these 3 decision choices, business people can treat one another 3 ways:

  • as 'tools/things' requiring instructions (essentially, components of process), 
  • as people requiring help (so they can do better in the immediate term and/or in the future), and
  • as objects of criticism (that is, telling or showing them where they are thinking inaccurately or acting badly).


As a business leader...

How do you think about your people?

How do you make decisions?

How do you communicate about the way decisions should be made at your organization?

How do you know your people understand your decision-making process?
 
How do you cover off the fact sometimes you will be wrong?

Tags:

Business Contains Only 3 Things | Communication: Improving Communication | Criticism: Constructive Criticism is an Oxymoron | Delegation & Decisions | Leaders' Thoughts | Questions?: The Art of Asking Good Questions | Seeking Simple!

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Thought Tweet #751

by Rick Baker
On Jun 3, 2013

Thought Tweet #751 Do Unto Yourself Before You Do Unto Others

 

The Thinking Behind The Tweet

Do unto others as you would have them do to unto you

[The Golden Rule...the foundation of major religions]

***

Don't do unto others what you wouldn't want them to do unto you

[a restatement that aligns with a Spirited definition of Integrity]

***

Do Unto Yourself Before You Do Unto Others

[a restatement that adds even tougher limits...and thickens the skin]

***

He who carries the gold makes the rules

[as if that's not enough of them - another Golden Rule]

***

Constructive Criticism - make sure you can take a self-injection of that oxymoron

Tags:

Criticism: Constructive Criticism is an Oxymoron | Humour | Thick Skin & Thin Skull | Thinking as in Think and Grow Rich | Thought Tweets

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