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Curiosity bolsters self-confidence.

by Rick Baker
On Aug 5, 2016

Curiosity opens the door to alternative realities: this is discovered when you are curious, when you ask questions and when you listen to other people's self-stories. 

When people see your [sincere] curiosity at play, most will reciprocate and share their realities with you - realities that are as true and accurate as yours...but, often, remarkably different than yours. 

There are, of course, other ways to learn about other people's realities. We live in the age of The Internet of Things and enormous volumes of information are available online. Consider Facebook and Twitter. These two online social media venues offer insight into people’s realities, or at least insight into the way they want to present their 'realities' to you in pictures and stories. 

To really get a full perspective on other people's realities it is better to interact with them face-to-face. Have real conversations. And to maximize those conversations, it is best to be curious and to ask good questions then observe and listen intently. 

Give people plenty of time to share their stories with you.

Curiosity is an innate talent. We all possess it. At least, at one time when we were young we certainly did.

Curiosity is also a learned skill. 

If life experiences have beaten curiosity out of you – don’t give up. Your curiosity can be resurrected. Your curiosity can also be enhanced so it will become a lifelong tool. Curiosity will help you understand other people in ‘your world’. Curiosity will allow you to understand how you differ from other people in very fundamental ways. And curiosity will help you understand why other people disagree with your views and sometimes refuse to embrace your views. As you gain understanding of the differences, the knowledge you gain will build your self-confidence. 

When you understand your perspectives differ from other people’s perspectives, you have the ability to construct your messages in ways that do not threaten other people’s perspectives. At the same time the messages embedded in your questions will help others understand your views. In effect, communication preparation – question preparation – is the key to building both self-confidence and personal relationships. Choose to deliver your viewpoints in ways that will be understood [questions] rather than in ways that will be poorly received [instructions]. When you develop skill in this area you will grow self-confidence. 

 

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