by Rick Baker
On Sep 8, 2011
Many years ago the sales people at my company were discussing buyers’ objections. The salespeople, more or less en masse, were troubled by what they perceived to be unfair treatment. Most of the sales people felt buyers were tricking them by stating false objections. In plain words – the buyers were lying to them. The buyers were saying things like “Your pricing is too high” when in fact the pricing was not too high. This annoyed my salespeople.
In an effort to help, I wrote a little piece titled ‘The Facts of Lies’.
Here is an excerpt from that piece:
“…don't be overly judgmental about people because of their lies. Everybody ‘Lies’ all the time...so, it really isn't that big of a deal. It simply ‘is’ ...‘what it is’. And, our motive - our motive - is not windfall, win-lose money, or power, or fame...etc. We just want to provide some Value to energy/environment users...make the world or at least Ontario a little bit better place for future generations...and make a few bucks as is required in commercial business.”
So, in summary:
- everyone lies
- lies are far more common than facts
- we don't judge - we observe, we listen.”
Since I wrote that note, I have learned much more about people. I now have a much better understanding around why people lie. As I blend in my new knowledge and re-think the topic of ‘lies’ I see no need to change the thrust of my advice to salespeople.
And, I offer that advice to leaders – not just salespeople.
When you realize you are biased - when you realize your filters cause you to judge others more harshly than you judge yourself – that’s an important starting place.
Next - you can be comfortable looking beyond the vast majority of those things most folks describe as 'lies'. Imagine yourself in a place where you are immune to other people’s lies. I don’t mean you are unable to see or hear the lies…I mean you can breathe other people’s lies in and you do not feel ill in any way….you can let other people’s lies get into in your ears and you don’t feel dizzy in any way….and I mean you can watch other people as they lie to you and your eyes do not squint in any way.
Imagine you are immune to other people’s lies…other people’s lies are their issue. You can observe the lies coming at you from all directions in a variety of different forms and none of the lies phase you.
You do not ‘take it personal’.
Imagine yourself in that place - that’s a good place to be.