Lately, a lot of people have been talking with me about stress.
Some people know they are under extreme amounts of stress.
Other people really don't know how much stress they are experiencing. They know lots of things are keeping them busy and lots of things and people are annoying or troubling them. But, they don't know whether or not they are under an unhealthy level of stress.
I recall reading about the work of JJ Kim and DM Diamond, recognized stress experts. Here's a link to an introduction/sample of their work.
Kim & Diamond provide a framework for understanding stress. We may not want to openly admit it...wait a minute...maybe denial contributes to stress levels.
You know you are under stress when:
- You experience an aroused physiological response to
- Something you would prefer to avoid which is
- To some degree beyond your control.
At first thought, it would seem most of us have the ability to know when our bodies undergo changes. Certainly, most of us know our bodies undergo changes when we are frightened or experience an intrusion or surprise that we would prefer to avoid. However, perhaps we have experienced an annoying thing or person for so long and with such regularity we lose track of the fact our blood pressure has risen or our heart rates have increased. Perhaps stress creeps up on us and causes a stacking of little bricks of stress?
Most of us know when we would prefer to avoid a thing or a person. Sometimes we are overly tolerant, putting up with the annoyance...wait a minute...Maybe that contributes to our stress levels. Say, for example, you work in an office environment and one of your co-workers is a first-rate nuisance. Sometimes we choose to be polite in the face of annoyances...Could that contribute to stress levels too? Yes, it likely adds at least a brick or two of stress.
And, say you feel you have no control over that nuisance co-worker: the co-worker doesn't report to you and doesn't report to your boss. Yet, your cubicle offers no escape route or hiding spot. This could be delivering bricks of stress to you...
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Some thoughts about Control...that 3rd Kim/Diamond criteria for stress.
There's an argument to be made - we have virtually no control over anything. I cannot control you. You cannot control me. Neither of us can control that nuisance co-worker. That nuisance co-worker's boss cannot control that nuisance co-worker. You and I and the nuisance co-worker and our bosses cannot control today's weather, or tomorrow's weather, or next week's sales, or...
There's an argument to be made - as Napoleon Hill and many others have done - you and I have ultimate control because we possess the ability to control our thoughts. We do not have to be annoyed by things or people...we can choose to not be annoyed. We can choose to remove our need to control. We can choose to remove our ability to experience stress.
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Egos are magnets for stress. That's a factor to consider.
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Thinking and writing about stress...a great way to not experience it.