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Control your ANTs and Influence People

by Rick Baker
On Mar 25, 2014

Dr Daniel Amen identified a problem that impairs people's happiness and success in life.

He called the problem "ANTs"...Automatic Negative Thoughts. 

***

Control of Automatic Negative Thoughts is a way to improve the quality of one's life1

Control of Automatic Negative Thoughts is also a way to expand one's ability to Influence other people.

***

"Summary of A.N.T. Species2:

  1. "Always" thinking: thinking in words like always, never, no one, every one, every time, everything.
  2. Focusing on the negative: only seeing the bad in a situation.
  3. Fortune telling: predicting the worst possible outcome to a situation.
  4. Mind reading3: believing that you know what another person is thinking, even though they haven't told you.
  5. Thinking with your feelings: believing negative feelings without ever questioning them.
  6. Guilt beatings: thinking in words like "should, must, ought or have to."
  7. Labeling: attaching a negative label to yourself or to someone else.
  8. Personalization: innocuous events are taken to have personal meaning.
  9. Blame: blaming someone else for your own problems."

 

Footnotes

  1. The process of controlling ANTs is a method [say, cognitive behavioural therapy method] of moving from pessimism toward optimism.
  2. Source: AHHA Self-Help Articles Collection  link 
  3. Mind reading: An important example is jumping to conclusions about other people's Intentions. Another important example of jumping to conclusions is Attribution Bias. 
***

"In psychology, an attribution bias or attributional bias is a cognitive bias that refers to the systematic errors made when people evaluate and/or try to find reasons for their own and others' behaviors. People constantly make attributions regarding the cause of their own and others’ behaviors; however, attributions do not always accurately mirror reality. Rather than operating as objective perceivers, people are prone to perceptual errors that lead to biased interpretations of their social world."

Tags:

Influencing | Optimism & Pessimism | Personalities @ Work

Thought Tweet #962

by Rick Baker
On Mar 25, 2014

Thought Tweet #962 Why not set up some self-hurdles that make it real tough to jump to conclusions. 

 

The Thinking Behind The Tweet

...unless you can think of a better way.

 

On Influence

by Rick Baker
On Mar 24, 2014

Influence is the magical part of leadership.

Influence is the magic that allows leaders to convert Vision and Desire into amazing actions and thrilling accomplishments.

So...How does one positively Influence others along the road to success?

Q: Does one need to be Intelligent?

A: Yes.

Q: Does one need to master Self-Control?

A: Yes

Q: Does one have to have Integrity?

A: Yes...if the success is to be constructive and sustained.

Q: Does one have to know People, Processes, & Situations?

A: Yes.

Q: Any other things?

A: Yes...here's 5...and here's 5 more...and here's another 5...and there's more.

***

What do the wise have to say about Influence? 

My favourite inspirational educator, Napoleon Hill said...

"Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another."

One of my heroes, Napoleon Bonaparte, said...

"The herd seek out the great, not for their sake but for their influence; and the great welcome them out of vanity or need."

Dale Carnegie, who wrote the book on how to win friends and influence people, said...

“When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.” 

Clint Eastwood, a widely respected Hollywood icon, said...

"It takes tremendous discipline to control the influence, the power you have over other people's lives."

And an unknown author said...

"Influence may be the highest level of human skills."

***

If you want to be a great leader, or a good leader, or even a leader who accomplishes a few meaningful things...it's tough to argue that last point.

PS: Sustained positive Influence is the cause that leads to trust.

 

Thought Tweet #961

by Rick Baker
On Mar 24, 2014

Thought Tweet #961 We never should have agreed to 'Show & Tell'. We should have insisted on 'Show'.

 

The Thinking Behind The Tweet

'Telling' ain't halfway near what it's cut out to be. Reminds me of my early career when we had a Mel Sell and a Mel Tell. Actually it was probably Mel Tel but nobody ever wrote it. They just said it.

Tags:

Communication: Improving Communication | Thought Tweets

Thought Tweet #960

by Rick Baker
On Mar 21, 2014

Thought Tweet #960 The great teachers didn't dwell on stress. They focused on the human virtues.

 

The Thinking Behind The Tweet

'Stressed' is a modern mindset.

Stressed: don't forget it's just a reverse palindrome for desserts.

Tags:

Attitude: Creating Positive Attitude | Thought Tweets | Wisdom: Surviving the Test of Time

Thought Tweet #959

by Rick Baker
On Mar 20, 2014

Thought Tweet #959 People think 600-700 words per minute. People talk 100-200 words per minute. Most people listen...maybe 8 or 10?

 

The Thinking Behind The Tweet

Listening - a little bit goes a long way. Just imagine what could be accomplished by a lot of listening.   

Tags:

Communication: Improving Communication | Thought Tweets

Copyright © 2012. W.F.C (Rick) Baker. All Rights Reserved.