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Name of author Rick Baker, P.Eng.

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Thought Tweet #855.5

by Rick Baker
On Oct 25, 2013

Thought Tweet #855.5 Stand down, Step up, & Listen.

 

The Thinking Behind The Tweet

Stand down - military folks say that when they want someone to relax or stop being aggressive.

Step up - regular folks say that when they want someone to get to a better place by doing something significant.

Listen - everyone says that more than they do it.

 

PS: Shut up, Stand down, Step up, & Listen. [The first part goes without saying.]

Tags:

Communication: Improving Communication | Thought Tweets

Thought Tweet #854.5

by Rick Baker
On Oct 24, 2013

Thought Tweet #854.5 When you criticize people you trigger their 'No' responses....and, at that point, constructive communication is over.

 

The Thinking Behind The Tweet

When 'No' thoughts are filling the brain there is little room for 'Yes" thoughts. In fact, chances are 'No' and 'Yes' thoughts will not want to occupy the brain at the same time. They would rather take turns. And, for most people the 'No' thoughts are much more sticky. When they find their way into people's brains they stick there until they run out of reasons to defend and bolster the ego.

While 'No' thoughts are sticking around the brain, working away to defend and bolster the ego there is little, if any, opportunity for constructive communication...particularly communication involving the person who triggers the 'No' response.

Thought Tweet #853.5

by Rick Baker
On Oct 23, 2013

Thought Tweet #853.5 If you cannot be interested at least be interesting.

 

The Thinking Behind The Tweet

Seek first to be interested and to understand. If you cannot handle that maybe you can compensate by being entertaining...or, at least, interesting.

Stephen Covey - Seek First To Understand.

Perhaps people will warm up to you and remember you if you seek first to understand them?

That's consistent with Dale Carnegie's teaching.

If you cannot bring yourself to be truly interested in understanding other people then your opportunities for influencing them drop significantly. You may be able to squeeze in some opportunities by:

  • being interesting...attention-getting, magnetic...those sorts of things
  • being entertaining...like a motivational speaker or a magician or a clown act

Tags:

Communication: Improving Communication | Influencing | Thought Tweets

Put your foot down...say "No" to "No"

by Rick Baker
On Oct 15, 2013

Beliefs: some good, some not-so-good

Beliefs intertwine with perceptions and patterns in your brain. Then beliefs manifest their influence, acting as your 'internal filters'. These filters guide your view of the world. These filters guide your behaviour. Your beliefs become deeply-held in your subconscious mind. From that strong base, your beliefs generate your habits…some good, some bad. Your beliefs determine your appetite for new things, your attitude toward change, and your ability to replace bad habits with good habits.

Do you know the true nature and depths of your beliefs?

Have you taken the time to 'dig deep' and understand your most-powerful beliefs?

These beliefs, your strong-and-deeply-rooted beliefs, govern your life: deep beliefs are the roots of your greatest joys; deep beliefs are the roots of your darkest fears.

Your deepest and most-strongly-held beliefs aid your efforts toward certain goals while they resist your efforts toward other goals. In these ways, your beliefs are fundamental to your life. They are fundamental to how you feel during your life and they are fundamental to whether or not you achieve the success you desire.

Where did your beliefs come from?

When it comes to questions like this, all of us are students. None of us know with certainty why or how we have beliefs. Yet, certain things make sense to us. As examples:

·         We perceive things and our perceptions of those things are taken to our brains

·         Our brains file vast amounts of information in memory, for future reference

·         Our brains like to simplify our lives so they sort things into patterns/concepts

·         With repetition bits and pieces of information solidify into bigger pieces and then into patterns

·         Diversity of perceptions expand and complicate perceptions, building a hierarchy of sorted/related patterns [and concepts]

An illustration...

When we are infants we hear our parents say the word "No". That's an audio perception. As our parents repeat the word "No" we learn "No" is an important part of our lives. Simple repetition of that spoken word causes neurons in our brains to construct deeper "No" pathways. Recognizing the importance of "No", our infant brains begin to build a "No" pattern. Our infant brains quickly pick up diverse perceptions that will feed into the "No" pattern. A parent may show an angry face while saying the word "No". The visual body language signal and the verbal sound signal send 2 separate messages, both of which feed into the growing "No" pattern in our infant brains. We notice/perceive that different situations precede our parents’ "No" messages. We perceive more diversity, more repetition and the "No" pattern becomes stronger, deeper, and more-nuanced. Even as infants we have a very broad and deep understanding of the word “No”. We recognize its sound, we recognize what it looks like when it is written, we recognize the facial expressions and the various forms of body language that accompany the word “No”, and we know the word “No” is expressed to us as a result of a wide range of different situations.

We learn our parents are not the only ones who deliver "No" messages to us. Other family members, to varying degrees, deliver "No" messages. We meet neighbours who have little people of their own and both those neighbours and the toddlers they bring into our lives add more "No" to our perceptions.

Why all this discussion around the word “No”?

That question begs the questions…

Do you understand how the pattern/concept “No” has fed negatives into your belief system?

Do you understand the extent the pattern/concept “No” throttles your efforts toward your desired goals & success?

Do you understand how to go about repairing the damage the word “No” has done to you belief system?

Are you willing to make an effort to find out?

Business communication...at its best

by Rick Baker
On Oct 14, 2013

Business communication, at its best, is:

  • Positive & Energized [not negative or over-stressed] 
  • Solution-Oriented & Constructive [not problem-dwelling or blame-pointing] 
  • Clear & Concise [not vague or protracted] 
  • Interesting & Magnetizing [not rote or drawing lines in the sand]
Each step we take to improve in each of these areas:
  • Helps our people feel better about work and more motivated to make the right decisions and take the right actions
  • Improves the results of our work, to the benefit of our people, our company, our clients & suppliers, and our community
  • Increases our long-term profitability and sustainability
  • Causes work to be an enjoyable and rewarding part of people's lives
Yet, many people claim they are too busy to do these things. Those people, by their failure to invest the time it takes to change, are confirming:
  • they accept negativity as an ongoing part of their workday...and they accept the resulting spirit-killing at their workplace 
  • they are OK with higher-than-required stress levels...and they are OK with the resulting physical and mental health problems
  • they follow ego wherever it leads rather than aim thoughts and action at results...so they place little value on achieving goals
  • they favour anxiety over thought-clarity...and they accept the resulting poor relationships and poor decisions
  • they choose to confuse...and they choose to expose their company to the errors that will surely follow
  • they see no need for inspiration in their workplace...by default, they know their people will fend for themselves

Tags:

Communication: Improving Communication | Leaders' Thoughts

Not a problem

by Rick Baker
On Oct 10, 2013

Did you teach your children to say, "Thank You"?

How often do you say those 2 simple words at work?

"Not a problem"...how often do people say that after you say, "Thank You"? 

Whatever happened to, "You're Welcome"?

Is "Not a problem" halfway between "Yes it is a Problem" and "I sure hate these pleasantries"?

Is "Not a problem" a clever way of bringing problem-thinking into the situation?

We should take these possibly small yet possibly very important communications more seriously...and make sure they do not become rote lukewarm Bad Habits.

Copyright © 2012. W.F.C (Rick) Baker. All Rights Reserved.