People disagree with one another. That's normal…people view situations differently.
Business partners disagree with one another. That's normal…there is value in differences.
Sometimes arguments get out of hand. That's normal...we all make mistakes, sometimes big ones.
Sometimes, when people spend years together in chronic disagreement and argument they can barely tolerate one another. Sometimes, items that should be easy to discuss and resolve become triggers for major upsets and slugfest battles. And sometimes, the ongoing stressed and strained relationship becomes quite dysfunctional, marked by irrational interactions. Little things said or done by one person, whether intentional or not, ignite and inflame the other person.
When relationships between business partners are like this, it is not normal.
When business partners live in chronic dispute it is not normal...and it is not healthy...not healthy for them…not healthy for other people they interact with...not healthy for the business.
Yet, as in any bad marriage, when business partners are in conflict it can be extremely difficult to repair the damages that, over time, created the root problem. The root problem is Failure to Communicate, coupled with at least one "character flaw". Failure to Communicate is a common problem. Character flaws are common problems.
When partners live in chronic dysfunction, egos are in continuous battle. Egos are in battle to gain control. Egos are in battle to experience feelings of importance.
Each person needs to feel in control and each person needs to feel important and appreciated.
Yet, because of the long history of dispute and discomfort, at least one partner refuses to give up ground to the other partner. And, at least one partner refuses to accept concessions when they have been extended by the other partner.
The situation is an impasse and the partners are locked in an uncomfortable and dysfunctional relationship of dispute and disagreement.
Why would business partners live that way?
They live that way because they do not know how to correct chronic interpersonal dysfunction. Most business people have received very little education in the areas of self-control, changing for the better, improving communication, or influencing other peoples’ behaviour.
They live that way because the problem of dysfunctional interpersonal interactions is offset, at least to a degree, by ‘positives’. ‘Positives’ are often complementary technical strengths.
Really, the choices are few. When partners are in chronic dispute they can:
- Accept that situation, truly accept the chronic dysfunction and stop viewing it as a problem, or
- Figure out how to part company, or
- Figure out how to remove the dysfunctional behavior.
Each of these courses of action can be easy or difficult.
It is a matter of mindset.
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